


Having My Baby

by thebrightestbird



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types, Thor (Movies)
Genre: F/M, M/M, Mpreg, Multi, Sweetness and Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-23
Updated: 2013-11-23
Packaged: 2018-01-02 10:40:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,079
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1055810
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thebrightestbird/pseuds/thebrightestbird
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Thor’s pregnant. Jane is caught off guard. The Avengers throw a baby shower. Mpreg crack with sweetness and humor.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Having My Baby

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this before Thor: The Dark World came out, so nothing about it applies in this weird little fic.

Jane is a scientist. This is a well-established fact, and she has some nicely embossed degrees laying at the bottom of boxes somewhere if someone questions her on it.

She likes to think her scientific mind makes her observant. Jane may be careening through the desert at unlawful speeds a lot of the time, but that doesn’t mean she isn’t cautious or observant or attentive to her surroundings, to her friends and colleagues. This includes the most important person in her life, Thor.

So when her Asgardian boyfriend bursts into her lab one Wednesday afternoon, in his caped and armored glory, and bellows four small, miniscule, monosyllabic words, she is caught off guard to say the least.

“I am with child!”

 -|-

Jane’s not only smart; she works hard and thrives on understanding more of anything and everything. And while the human body still has an infinite number of mysteries, Jane avoided medicine as a field of study because the sky seemed much more obviously wondrous. She would look up, and the questions would be written out in the field of stars.

But maybe she should have taken more biology courses after all because her extremely male (and she’s checked) boyfriend just told her he was pregnant.

“And who’s the father? Er, uh, mother? Wait, no, father. Right?” Of all the responses she could give, this is what Jane’s very smart brain chooses to blurt out.

“My dearest Jane,” Thor says with the biggest of smiles, “you are to be a mother.”

-|-

Jane could have freaked out. (She has every reason to freak out.)  But again: Scientist, degrees, smart, dollar-store lab equipment, and a Winnebago. She takes a deep breath, calmly requests that Thor explain (“How, Thor? How? How, how, holy hell, how?”), and once she understands the Asgardian biological functions involved in conceiving, her brain is back in the driver’s seat.

She’s going to be a mom. She’s got this.

-|-

Thor is seven months pregnant, and luckily for Jane’s sanity, Asgardian pregnancies progress on the same timetable as human pregnancies.

For the Avengers, the seven-month mark means it’s time for a baby shower. Darcy explains: “Well, the big guy is finally really showing, which has given those few who were still in denial  _coughClintTonycough_  no more reasons for pretending that all of the post-battle trips to Earth’s Mightiest Shawarma ™ were getting the better of an alien-god’s metabolism.”

The lovely view from the living room on Jane and Thor’s floor of Avengers Tower is obstructed by a wall of wrapped gifts. Tony’s gifts are the largest, of course.

“Don’t we have to play that game first?”

“What are you talking about, Tony?”

“You know, the one with the toilet paper or duct tape, and we wrap it around blondie like a mummy to symbolize his impending motherhood.”

Pepper’s only response is silence. Maybe some teeth-grinding if Jane’s ears aren’t playing tricks.

Dr. Banner slips himself between them, a champagne flute in each hand. Pepper and Tony down the liquid with gusto. He doesn’t sit down though. Just slips his arms around their waists, becoming their link, their center. Tony brings a hand to the back of Bruce’s neck and lightly scratches. Pepper covers Bruce’s hand with hers and gives a sigh. “Why don’t we just let Thor tear into these gifts, shall we?” Dr. Banner suggests. Bless him.

“But Steve and James aren’t here yet,” Natasha says while scanning the room.

“No, they are,” Clint says. “I saw them when I came out of the bathroom.”

He and Natasha are sitting on the loveseat. Well, Clint’s actually spread out on it, forcing Natasha to use some of his thigh to sit on. The things he’ll do to get public touching going with her tend to be creative – and maybe a bit mean. During the last team movie night, in order to get the prime middle seats, Clint convinced a group of  _Star Trek_  geeks that Leonard Nimoy was sitting in the back of the theater secretly observing the audience’s reaction to the latest movie. They managed to find someone with naturally pointy ears instead.

“Where were they going?” Natasha asks.

“I dunno. The bathroom, I guess.” Clint then puts on his thinking face.

Luckily, Natasha has no patience for that and kicks his brain into gear. “Together? They were going to the bathroom together?”

“Yeah… oh. Why the hell were they going to the bathroom together?”

Darcy chooses that moment to shuffle into the room while muttering “oh my god” over and over. “Guys! Guys! Guess what I just interrupted.” She has the biggest, perviest grin on her face. “And Jane, you owe me 50 bucks.”

All eyes turn to Jane, and she realizes exactly what Darcy is talking about. “Nooo. Really? How much did you see?”

“Well, I didn’t get the door all the way open because Bucky was in the way, and he shoved my face out of the opening – with the metal hand, I might add.  _Rude._  But I startled Steve enough that he fell, and I got a peek at his package.” Darcy pauses to let that sink in. Her face is beaming with pride, as if seeing Captain America without pants was a great accomplishment. “I’m pretty sure it was a blowjob.”

There’s the sound of a throat clearing, and everyone turns to the entrance from where Steve and Bucky are doing the walk of shame toward the group. They’re still not saying anything once they reach the gift area. Bucky seems fascinated by the toy _Mjölnir_  that Darcy didn’t bother to wrap.  (“It’s a hammer. It is hammer-shaped. I’m not wasting the time.”) Steve couldn’t stand straighter or more rigid if he tried, and his face is as red as Natasha’s hair.

“My friends, I am so glad to hear of your union.” Thor turns to Jane and tucks a lock of hair behind her ear, then pats his belly. “I wish you the same happiness that Jane and I share.”

Jane has to face the fact that her smarts don’t make her more observant because she is caught completely off guard again. She looks up at Thor, this radiant, brave, impossible man who is pregnant with her child.

Jane is a scientist, she is going to be a mom, and she is so very happy.

-|-

“Tony, really?” Bruce is helping clear some of the gift wrap from the floor. “Everything, everything you gave them was by …”

“You got it,” Tony says, smugly. “BabyBjörn.”


End file.
